This is an original post written by Danielle at Obsession Bella. Thank you for listening to her story.



I have been asked several times “when are you due?” or something along the lines of that.

The first time was at the grocery store. The cashier was asking me how old my 2 daughters were (they were 4 and 2), and she’s like, “and you’re having another”! I had a little laugh, but then thought…am I really THAT big to look like I’m pregnant? And every time I look at myself, I AM that big. I’m not wide, but my belly looks like I am about to pop out a baby any second. Sometimes I wish I was pregnant again because that would give me a perfect reason as to why I look pregnant. Anyway, so I just laughed a little and told her I wasn’t expecting another.

Another time was on Halloween of 2010.  The lady at one of the houses asked when I was due, and I said I wasn’t pregnant. She felt so bad and kept apologizing. Saying that we’d never want to go to her house again (which really didn’t matter because I didn’t know her in the first place). But how is someone supposed to react when someone asks them something like that?

It makes me so upset with myself. I was never this big, and I am not okay being this way. I’ve tried doing something about it, but it seems no matter what I do, I can’t lose weight.

Another time was when I was taking my daughter to the ER and when I went up to the desk, the lady asked me if it had anything to do with my pregnancy. I was like, “”I’m not pregnant”" and she actually tried to pull it off by saying it was just something they always have to ask. Which I know is BS. I have been to the ER when I WAS pregnant and they NEVER asked that.

I watch What Not To Wear all the time too. I was actually watching it last night and typed in “”How to hide a pregnant looking belly”" on Google and found this website.

Maybe one of these days I can get rid of this belly…or at least hide it.

Danielle is a mother of 2 girls. They were both born on May 12th, exactly 2 years apart. She is a Mommy Blogger and writes at adeliciousobsession.com.

This is an original post written by Bobbie. Thank you for listening to her story.

I have a 3 year old daughter and a soon-to-be 7 month old son and only birthed large babies (my first was 9 pounds, and my second was 10 pound – both born via c-section).

• Every day I try on a needless five outfits…and I end up not caring in the long run.
• I’m constantly asked “What are you having?” and told “How exciting you’re expecting again!”
• The only response I can provide is “No, I’m not pregnant… just fat.” What else is there to say?
• Honestly I have not started to diet. I know, shameful.
• And I do not exercise.

It took me 2 years after having my first child to become comfortable with my body again. I remind myself of this every day. In time my body will go back to its old self (aside from mass amounts of stretch marks).

I think I may need to start a separate tummy-tuck savings account.

Bobbie has a beautiful daughter and son and they are living proof that dreams come true.

photo credit: A. Strakey

Liz, over at The Paper Bluebird, understands our pain and is ready to let everyone know just how rude it is to assume someone is pregnant because they might not be!

See what makes her Moonbat Crazy when people think she still looks pregnant in her latest blog post I’m NOT PREGNANT!!

photo credit: Espen Klem

This is an original post written by Tabatha. Thank you for listening to her story.

My daughter is now two and half years old,  and I have always got the “I thought you got fixed” question from people.  I have lost 132 pounds since giving birth, I am down to 213, but unlike most women my weight is all in my very round pregnant looking belly.

I just got hired at a gas station and my boss thought I was pregnant. He wanted to give me a 5x shirt to “grow” into. I wanted to yell at her but I laughed and said if I am pregnant there are some doctors that have some explaining to do.

I hate feeling pregnant.

I want it to go away but it seems the more weight I loose the more I look pregnant.

Tabatha is a 30 year old mom of five (4 with feet and 1 with wings)

photo credit: ripkas

This is an original post written by Stephanie. Thank you for listening to her story.   Share your story.

I am so happy to find this website.  I really thought I might be the only person who still looks pregnant!  Actually, if I hold my belly in, I don’t look pregnant, but this is not really comfortable.

I have been listening to this incredible series of interviews which you can find at The Body Image Revolution.  The last speaker was a woman who wrote a book called The Woman’s Belly Book: Finding Your True Center for More Energy, Confidence, and Pleasure and she talks about how she yo yo dieted for years before realizing that she could love her belly, and embrace it as the center of her femininity.

I love that concept, but I have a hard time not holding my belly in, because I am afraid of people thinking I am pregnant.  Yes, people have thought that after both my pregnancies.

It is encouraging — really encouraging — to hear that other people get this response too.

I have been wondering,

Is it a big deal if someone thinks I’m pregnant?  Does it really matter?

What if my fear is keeping me living in shame and keeping me from really loving my body and myself?”

Now that I know lots of other women still look pregnant, or look pregnant even if they have never had a baby, I am not going to be so worried.  I do think bellies are cute and feminine, and a person who looks comfortable in their body is generally attractive.

If anyone wants to read a really great article by Lisa Sarasohn, check out The Goddess Ungirdled.  It’s an article on how she came to love her belly.

I am encouraged and going to work on being comfortable with my belly.

Stephanie is a mommy of a three year old boy and ten month old girl.  Her blog is www.lionmammaspun.blogspot.com.

This is an original post written by Hanni. Thank you for listening to her story.

I have two boys, one is three years old and another one is one and a half.  They were both quite big babies, both weighing in at almost 4 kg (8.8 pounds). I am quite short (1.62m/5.3 feet) and have a very short upper body, so I carried very large in both my pregnancies, especially with the second one.

People were constantly asking me if I was sure I wasn’t expecting twins.  Also, when I was only about 5 months along, people would ask me when I was due – as if I was going in to hospital the next day.

Now, however, a year and a half after my second boy’s birth, I am constantly asked, or people who barely know me (and some who do) inquire as to whether I’m pregnant again.  Just the other day, in fact, when I was visiting the zoo with my boys, a lady in front of me started talking to me, and through our conversation she just happened to casually ask:

“When’s your baby due?”

I’m not pregnant at the moment, but wanted to spare her the humiliation, so I answer:

“Oh, I’m not very far along yet.”

On hearing this she replied:

“But you’re so big already!”

I was quite exasperated by this answer, but it didn’t really hit me until my husband and I started making love that night.

Then I started feeling really fat and ugly and sad.

Many others have also recently asked or implied they thought I was pregnant again.  I hate this, but know that my tummy does indeed look big enough to think I might be pregnant again.  Am struggling to eat the right things as my boys are not sleeping well and I’m constantly tired.

Sweet things are sometimes the only thing that makes me feel like I’m being nice to myself.

Hanni is a mother of 2 very busy boys. She works a couple of mornings a weeks and struggles to keep her weight off after two pregnancies and two big babies (both delivered by C-section). She has no motivation to exercise and she’s eating all the wrong things though she knows she shouldn’t.

If you can relate to Hanni’s story, reach out and leave a commit below…

photo credit: Alyssa L. Miller

This is an original post written by Jen.
Thank you for listening to her story.

I had my last miscarriage (of 3) in April of 2008. I have always been slim and petite but I have lost about 18 pounds since the miscarriage and now fluctuate between 115 and 118 pounds at 5 ft.

It’s very hurtful to see people excited and happy asking me if or when I’m expecting since I can’t seem to carry full term and I want to be a mother. It makes me vulnerable because I feel obligated to explain how I got this way, especially to people that know me.

I used to love my body now I spend all my time trying to cover it up. I feel so unattractive.

Jen is a 34 year old receptionist.

Together we unite. YOU are not alone!        

photo credit: Dyanna

This is an original post written by Lucie. Thank you for listening to her story.

I got back from vacation and downloaded my pictures. While I knew I was no where near my ideal weight, I still did not think it was too bad. Boy was I wrong. On the first day the waitress pointed to my 8 year old son and said “1 baby” then she pointed to my 5 year old daughter and said “2 babies” and then she pointed at my stomach and said “3 babies”. That did not start the vacation off too well. But now that I have downloaded the pictures I so see what she meant!

I’m the mom of two great kids, without another on the way.  I have battled my weight for 15 years now and even if I have tried every diet out there, I never have managed to reach my goal.  I find I lose weight so much slower than anybody else I know even if I follow everything correctly.  I follow a spinning class 3 times per week and weight train at least once per week, but I cannot get the weight off my stomach no matter what I do.  I have recently started a website www.knit1painttoo.etsy.com where I sell hand knit baby hats.  I love knitting so I tend to want to sit down after supper to make hats instead of go for a walk or play with the kids.  I’m sure I have metabolic syndrome as I pretty much have all the signs but no high blood pressure.  I’m so glad I’m not alone out here and I’ve found others with the same problem.

This is an original post written by Mama Maria. Thank you for listening to her story.

I have looked pregnant ever since having my son, who is 2 1/2 now.  From the time he was about 4 or 5 months, I have been constantly asked when I am due.  Some examples include:

• The priest at church rubbing my belly in front of a large group and saying “another one so soon?”
• Running into a friend of a friend who said “oh, I haven’t seen you in a while – you look great! when’s the baby due? your son must be so
  excited to be a big brother!” when I said I was not expecting, she said “oh! I’m sorry – I just thought…”
• I was on a flight and a woman with a little girl needed 2 seats together as they were sitting apart.  I gave her mine when no one else would and she said “oh, thank you – I was getting worried that no one would help me out.”  I said “oh, that’s okay – I have a little boy about your daughter’s age.”  She said “oh, and you’re expecting another? congratulations!”

I could fill your page with more stories like this.

It’s so bad that often, I don’t want to go out socially.  I don’t have anything to wear (I was a tiny hour-glass fashionista before baby.)  I follow all the suggestions of what to wear for apple shapes, but nothing works and some of them make me look even worse.  I’m way past the point of Spanx working.  My maternity clothes fit and look great but I feel too weird to wear them.  I worry about people I haven’t seen in a while assuming I am pregnant.

I worry about pictures being taken – when they show up on Facebook, people write their congratulations all over them.  I have to do job interviews shortly and I don’t know what to wear and whether employers will be assuming that I’ll be going out on maternity leave in a few months.

If strangers ask, I usually go along with it, but when it’s people I know, I play dumb, but usually they push me to the point when I can’t anymore and then it remains awkward between us forever more.

To make it even more heartbreaking, three months ago or so my husband and I started trying for #2.  I had originally wanted to wait until I was back in shape, but when that didn’t happen, I decided I didn’t want to wait any more.  (I’m a full-time law student and mother still nursing my son – all those grand plans of working out and cooking from scratch never happened!) I have to force myself to have sex with my husband.  I feel unattractive and I know he doesn’t enjoy my big belly.  I try to get into positions that hide it and get it over with as fast as possible – sexy, I know.

To make things worse, my son was conceived on the first try, but after about four cycles, I have had no luck with #2.  I don’t know if the extra weight is a problem or if we aren’t having sex as frequently now, but so far, nothing.  So now when people ask if I am pregnant and it’s right after I’ve just disappointingly got my period, I am ready to burst into tears (WHY do people think it is ok to ask people such personal questions?  never mind if someone is infertile, has just lost a baby, only wants one child or none, etc. etc but your nosy need to know must be satisfied?) I want to be pregnant so badly, if only to match how I look and be able to answer the question with “yes.”

My plan is that as soon as exams are over, I will be hitting the gym every day and eating healthy.  Hopefully, that either helps me get pregnant or at least lets me look and feel cuter this summer…

Maria is finishing up her second year of law school on the Dean’s Honor List and hopes to practice in the area of medical malpractice defense.  She is married and the mother of a beautiful, bright, two-year-old boy.  Prior to law school, she was a professional actress and playwright and she hopes to combine her love of drama with her performances in the courtroom.

This is an original post written by Kristen. Thank you for listening to her story.

Well…

A few weeks ago at work, someone said “When are you due?” I’m like “Never!!!!!!” She felt really bad, I told her not to worry about it.

But I’m worried!

Then within the same week, someone else asked me if I was pregnant and rubbed my belly! I’m like, “Why is this happening to me?!”

I did gain over 20 lbs. in the last year, and no, I am not pregnant. I have a 5 year old and lost the weight right after him. Gained a little back, lost a lot, and now it’s back…but it went to the wrong area! why could it have gone to my boobs…then maybe I wouldn’t be so critical about my stomach! LOL.

Man, I am glad I could vent all that.

Kristen is 26 and a single mother of a 5 year old.